Monday, August 5, 2013

My PED Confession

Well, with all of these MLB suspensions of players for PED use. And with all the very sad lying and denying by guys like Braun and A-Rod, I decided to come clean before my past catches up with me. I am ashamed of my actions to say the least, but want to clear the air in advance of any official probe into my past. While working as a morning DJ in Atlanta I was hopelessly addicted to PED’s. Yes, Performance Enhancing Donuts. Sure, almost everyone I knew doing morning radio were on PED’s, but that is no excuse. And sure management turned a blind eye toward the obvious use of these dangerous pastries. Heck, there were many times when boxes of PED’s were passed around the building and left open on the table in the break room. But still, not a word was spoken by those in charge. Did PED’s help my game? I can’t say for sure, but during a hot morning show topic with every in-studio phone line blinking, that shot of sugar surely didn’t hurt. Was I fooling myself? Most likely. But in a world where ratings meant everything, it was so very easy to convince myself that to be on an even playing field with my competition (who I am sure were on PED’s), any extra “help” could only be beneficial to me. With this admission of PED use, the Georgia Radio Hall of Fame will most likely take a closer look at my 2011 induction. But a word of warning to the powers that be at the GRHOF. Performance Enhancing Donuts were widely used by DJ’s going all the way back to the 1950’s. No doubt almost every single inductee into the Hall of Fame has on more than one occasion used PED’s. Finally, I apologize to my loyal listeners, my co-workers, my morning show partner Randy (also a PED user), and my family for my lack of judgment involving PED’s. I am sorry. --Spiff Carner


Holly Perryman said...

I forgive you! In the spirit of coming clean or purging in your case - I too suffer from an addiction to PED - PURCHASING EVERYTHING DISEASE aka Retail Therapy. I'm ashamed.

Former Georgian said...

Just one question - Where can I get one of those donuts in your picture?

Spiff said...

Can't remember where I got that tasty treat. Think my wife brought it home with her.